Monday, October 12, 2009

"It is finished."

At 1:41 this afternoon, I walked out of the surgeon's office port-free and cancer-free. Jesus said, "It is finished." I just said, "Yahoooooo!"


Detecting that I'm cancer-free is medically a matter of faith at this point, though I'm quite certain of it. But there's absolutely no question that I am port-free. Unlike the procedure to put it in, I was awake for its removal. I can't tell you exactly what it looked like because they hung a curtain between my face and my chest, supposedly so I wouldn't contaminate the site with my breath or a sneeze. More likely it was there so I wouldn't throw up or strangle the surgeon if I watched.

The same surgeon who put it in almost seven months ago, took it out today, using the original 1-inch incision, a few inches below my right collar bone. After numbing up the area, he tugged and jimmied out the purple walnut sized rubber port along with the 7-inch long tube that had been inserted in a vein going into the main artery of my heart. Just like at the dentist, the numbing needles hurt as much or more than the real work they're doing; but from the sounds and sensations of him working, I could tell it didn't just pop out on its own.


I haven't bled to death, so I guess he was right that the vein closes in on itself when the tube is pulled out. I'm not sure what the lovely red body tissue is on the tray. I didn't ask to take it home, nor do I plan to use the port in a Cancer Journey Shadow Box, like one patient reportedly made. Instead, I'll just preserve the memory through this beautiful photo I'm sharing with you.

I'll keep the dressing on for a week and by then the stitches should have dissolved. It feels a little tender and itchy but nice to not feel the tube going up over my collar bone and the tightness and lump of the port coming out of my chest. I'm glad to have had it (way easier to get the chemo through it and to have blood samples taken from it)...but very glad to have it no more.

(This photo shows how the port looked in me: the purple area on the left is it, sticking up from underneath my skin and the dot on my collar bone is where the tube came up and over it. Both felt weird to touch.)

I finished radiation last Tuesday the 6th -- also a major "Yahoooooo!" because it marked the end of my daily treatment routine and back to a normal "my life" routine. Here's a photo taken in the changing room where I went everyday to don a lovely blue and white cotton hospital gown. When I own my own radiation oncology firm, I will supply my clients with colorful polar fleece gowns in a variety of colors and styles, and none with open backs and tricky ties.

The radiology clinic staff did provide some nice touches though. Not only were they kind and fun to be with each day, but they always had jigsaw puzzles in the waiting room, an assortment of cookies to munch on and a "Happy Day" cake to celebrate my last day of radiation.


The radiation itself proved to be quite painless and unobtrusive, except for the time it took out of each day. I didn't feel particularly tired and was able to get back to normal work and activities throughout the seven weeks of treatment. My dad drove out from Iowa ("Thank you, Dad!!!") to drive with Hannah and I to a soccer tournament in Vail two weekends ago but I was fine doing all of the driving (3 hours each way) and again this weekend when Hannah and I and our friend Vivian drove to Estes Park for a women's retreat. I even started an exercise program for cancer patients at the hospital and am doing fine with that. There's no question which breast got the radiation as my entire left breast and underarm was bright red, like a bad sunburn. A week after my last radiation, it's now starting to peel and get less red and should return to normal pretty quickly.

The book I've been working on throughout radiation -- Radiation Rhema -- is coming together beautifully. It will have 36 days worth of verses and photos, telling the truth about God's love, light, peace and healing power. I hope to finish it in the next few weeks. Stay tuned here for links to it in my on-line bookstore.
Our new Faith Walkers site (http://www.faithwalkers2.c0m/) is also going well. We've heard of women in China, Singapore and across the U.S. being encouraged by it, which really encourages us too! Feel free to share it with anyone you know facing cancer. And if you can donate to Jana Johnson's Koman Foundation 3-Day Breast Cancer Walk funds, I would be personally grateful: donate here.
Now faith is being sure of what we hope for
and certain of what we do not see.
Hebrews 11:1

Praise the LORD, O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name.

Praise the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits-
who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases,
who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion,
who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.

The LORD works righteousness and justice for all the oppressed.
He made known his ways to Moses, his deeds to the people of Israel:
The LORD is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.
He will not always accuse, nor will he harbor his anger forever;
he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities.

For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his love for those who fear him;
as far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

As a father has compassion on his children,
so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;
for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust.
As for man, his days are like grass, he flourishes like a flower of the field;
the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more.

But from everlasting to everlasting the LORD's love is with those who fear him,
and his righteousness with their children's children-
with those who keep his covenant and remember to obey his precepts.
The LORD has established his throne in heaven, and his kingdom rules over all.
Praise the LORD, you his angels, you mighty ones who do his bidding, who obey his word.
Praise the LORD, all his heavenly hosts, you his servants who do his will.
Praise the LORD, all his works everywhere in his dominion.
Praise the LORD, O my soul.
Psalm 103

1 comment:

  1. I asked the surgeon if I could have what I called "my purple heart" when he took it out (a year after my chemo for ovarian)! While I just wanted to put it all behind me, I thought it would be a good memento or reminder of what I'd gone through. His prompt "No" was a stern one, not the amused one that I would have expected!

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